Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Random Musings from the Aquarium

Today, we took Isaac to the Newport Aquarium. While there, I had a couple of random thoughts flutter through my mind and I thought why not share them with the blogging world.
What is it about Nachos and Cheese that makes me want to go to a minor league baseball game and eat ice cream out of one of those little baseball helmets that the ice cream comes in? I had some nachos and cheese today and it made think about going to see the Greenville Braves. Then I remembered that the Greenville Braves left town. Besides by the time I drove from Cincinnati to Greenville, the ice cream in that little baseball helmet would already be melted and probably look like milk curds.

The second thing I wondered was..... do you think that the fish are happy in the aquarium? They seemed kind of melancholy. You know, like they were pensive for some reason. Of course I would be too if had to swim around in a two foot by two foot box all day. I'm quite sure I wouldn't be able to swim in a two foot by two foot box being that I am 6 foot tall and 185 pounds(ok I am actually 189.(well if I'm truthful 191( Actually it is 194 lbs. I stop there). If I were able to even get in a two foot by two foot box, then I bet people would pay money to see me do that. Now there is a money making idea to ponder. I wonder.................... Na. It's already been done. There was a guy in the 1980's from India that used to fold himself up into a two foot by two foot box. He was on the TV show "That's Incredible" one time. I think it was the same episode where the guy memorized the phone book.

Thirdly, I don't really enjoy aquariums all that much. The fish just stand there(err swim there). No action takes place. Like they don't try to eat each other or anything. So I thought of an idea that would make an aquarium more exciting. Actually, it would be part aquarium/ part restaurant. The top floor would be a restaurant called "Angler's Paradise". The patrons would come into the restaurant and purchase a fishing ticket for what kind of seafood they would like to eat that evening(guppies, sea bass, shrimp, lobster, shark etc.). They then would be given the proper fishing gear, depending on what they purchased and then would proceed to the angling area. The angling area would be a big huge aquarium with fishing platforms where you would catch your dinner. Underneath the restaurant would be the aquarium. It would be called "Death of Nemo". There you would be able to watch as the sea creatures spend their last few minutes in the friendly confines of the giant glass haven. Now that would be exciting. Imagine watching a 20 lb sea bass being reeled in for diner. Now that is aqua entertainment.

The last productive thought I had today was this. It only works for people who have kids 2 years or younger. Trust me though, this will save you lots of money over the years. After we went to the aquarium today, we stopped at Pet Smart. As I walked in, I began thinking, if Isaac was young enough then I just could lie to him and tell him that Pet Smart was the aquarium. If he was like two years old, I could just tell him that we were going to the aquarium every week. The best part is Pet Smart doesn't charge $15.95 to look at their fish. As he grew up, he wouldn't know any better and I would have saved tons of money. I mean, they have the same stuff. They each have fish that do absolutely nothing exciting. They each have tons of tanks. Just tell your kids that the rest of the store is the gift shop. By the time they are old enough to figure it out they would be tired of going to aquariums anyway.

Well my brain has done enough pondering today. I think I'll go eat and add to the 194.

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